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Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Text your way into her...Heart/Mind/Bed

- This is based on real events and for the sake of privacy the names of characters have been altered...well..not really-

Chad: "Hey, you see that Angel Goddess over there?"
Friend: "ummm yes, what about her?"
Chad: "We totally hooked up, and she even gave me her BB pin"
Friend: "Whats her name, I'll check her out on Facebook"....."mmm, she has a decent Profile Pic, she has 280 friends and I'm sure shes a quality chick cause those women with over 2000 Facebook friends are always trouble"
Chad: "Awesome, I cant wait to text her, I think im going to marry her"


Chad stairs at his BB and decides to text the Angel Goddess he met the night before....

Chad: "hey, im Chad, remember me? lol :P We hooked up last night and I had a great time and I'd really like to see you again because I think that you are so beautiful and I've never met anyone like you before. I would love to take you out to this fancy restaurant and we could hold hands all the way there. Are you free tomorrow????


Angel Goddess: "Hey, I'd really love to go, I unfortunately have other plans."


Now ladies and gentlemen we at CapeBandit Enterprises have influenced many great triumphs of human ingenuity and innovation. It saddens us that the human population shall be facing complete and utter devastation.Our genes are being un-apologetically whipped off the face of the earth as a result of weak Text Game.

We have now taken it upon ourselves to provide you with a definitive guide to texting...a mere mortal might stop there...oh no..we shall go further, lets be honest... trivial chit chat and pleasantries does not build attraction. So one might then question whether it was humanly possible to create that 'chemistry' that will leave her flustered every time she see's your name pop up on her cell phone screen. 

Before we go any further we must warn you that CapeBandits does not take responsibility for the endless amount of phone calls, texts, emails, Facebook wall posts that you will be receiving after you have applied the information that we will now share with you.....

Continue reading at your own risk.........

OK the key to successful Text Game is divided into three core characteristics, namely that of timing, content and prizability.


Timing refers to the amount of time which should pass before you send off your first text message. Now gentlemen this area is often misunderstood. An amateur would tell you to wait 2 days, now this strategy would work well if your aim was to get last minute date cancellations. Now a CapeBandit would send that first text within 5 minutes....Is that a shocked face I see ??..I never said that everything you've ever know up to this point wouldn't be made irrelevant...Imagine the scene..

CapeBandit:  Inserts number into his phone...then walks away for 2min...returns and says "sorry. I just need to text this cute chick who I met, she seems interesting but I'm scared she might be a stalker"
Angel Goddess: "umm..sure"

Whilst in her company the CapeBandit would then whip out his phone and send a text to the Angel Goddess right next to him. It would read " Who is that awesome guy standing next to you?"

This technique would genuinely be met with laughter, its unique and it breaks the ice for you to text again. 

Another element of timing is that of response speed... the rule of thumb is to be BUSY..or at least appear busy.This places more value on your responses because ladies tend to loose interest in someone who is always readily available.


The ultimate purpose of texting is to flirt,create a little connection , and get the women thinking about you. So do not try to engage in long drawn out logical conversations. One only needs to analyse the methods applied by a CapeBandit.

A CapeBandit:

* Does not come across as "Nice"
* Does not seek approval
* Does not ask questions, he prefers to lead conversations...nobody enjoys interviews
* Does not extend invitations

When it comes to content, there is only one real rule...DO NOT BE BORING ! ! ! !

Boredom can easily be one of the greatest human fears, why you might ask? Boredom has no feeling in it. Women thrive on emotions and feelings so try to add some variety that is not generic or predictable. Lets illustrate this below...

Scenario 1

Angel Goddess: "Hey, what did you do last night?"

Newbie : "Went to the movies, and you?"

Angel Goddess: "Not much, chilled at home"

Newbie: "Cool"

Angel Goddess: "Yeah..."

Scenario 2

Angel Goddess: "Hey, what did you do last night?"

CapeBandit: " Hey, I saw a movie and it got me thinking about you"

Angel Goddess: "Ooh Really ?? :)"

CapeBandit: " There was this adorable little puppy, that whined like you :)"

Now it does not take a genius to figure out which scenario invites the female on a unpredictable emotional rollercoster.

Top 4 Text Conversation starters:

1. "When we were thumb wrestling you weren't wearing a glove. Now im pregnant. We need to talk :)"
2. "Think I just found some batgirl underwear for you"
3. "I think I just saw your twin right now..Are you stalking me?"
4.    CapeBandit: "Stop! "
       AG: "Stop what?"
       CapeBandit: "Stop smiling and thinking about me. See, you're doing it. . right. . . now. "
       AG: "Oh, you caught me!" 
5. "Yeah..You're far"


Even though you have been provided with all this information, your text game will still be lacking if you lack prizability. Women enjoy challenges and once you appear too easily attainable, you will be fighting a lost cause my friend. An analogy could be made to that of a cat, dangle a ball of string in front of a kitten and it will do almost anything to get it, however once you drop the string, the cat will sniff it and loose interest very quickly. Everybody loves to win trophies, however nobody really cares if it was won in a one man competition. Show that you are confident enough to express your interest and if its not reciprocated, you are more than willing to end that conversation and move on to greener pastures.

So follow these steps and a new world of possibility awaits you...If you have any questions not contact me...if it is an emergency..just walk up to any beautiful women and ask for me by name...


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